Nobody Wanted To Go Inside the Darkest Valley.



For years, I have been consumed in the video gaming world until I decided to enter into semi-retirement from being video gamer for 35 years in order to pursue new interests in my life journey in the presence of God.  However, all years of being video gamer which provided me with rich knowledge about storyline in each video game series such as Ninja GaidenResident EvilSilent Hill, Dead Space, & others which has hidden theological view.  All of those storylines have hidden meanings on how it applies to our life.

I am always fascinated by the Ryu Hayabusa (see picture above), the protagonist of the Ninja Gaiden series.  He was considered the lone wolf whom is in the quest for the justice aftermath of tragedy brought on his family & clan, which brought him inside the darkest valley where it gave him a new life as a true warrior of his own clan.  Based on interesting research as I discovered more information about character, Ryu Hayabusa which was originated according to the game canon:

Ryu (lit. “Dragon”) Hayabusa (“falcon”) is a ninja and the leader of the Hayabusa Clan (隼一族Hayabusa-Ichizoku). The clan is said to have spiritual, physical and magical ties to ancient dragons. He is arguably the most popular ninja character to ever be featured in video games.

So whoever goes inside the darkest valley will sense much parallel to Ryu Hayabusa’s journey into being true warrior.

Nobody ever wanted to go into the darkest valley of his or her life! Little we did realize that inside the darkest valley have great valuable tools where we truly missed during our normal journey. For years I was truly scared to go in there because I might lose something & someone very important to me.

Let it go, let God…

This quote keeping echoing in my head many times until my head truly gets hurt where I saw how I was beginning at the entrance of darkest valley. What is in there? I am truly clueless about what is inside the darkest valley.

My life is full of dilemmas and what if…

One Saturday morning, which was filled with fog and crispy as I drove down the road at Talladega National Forest in Alabama as I am on the way to Alabama School for the Deaf for Football game.



During driving and I saw there is a beautiful overlook scenic view so I decided to park my car in middle of Talladega National Forest.  I pulled out my lawn chair out of my car trunk (I always left the lawn chair in there all the time because it can be useful on wherever I am going! ) As I sat in the presence of beautiful green mountain and I was led to mediation on Psalm 23:

The Lord is my shepherd;

I have all that I need.

He lets me rest in green meadows;

he leads me beside peaceful streams.

He renews my strength.

He guides me along right paths,

bringing honor to his name.

Even when I walk

through the darkest valley,[a]

I will not be afraid,

for you are close beside me.

Your rod and your staff

protect and comfort me.

You prepare a feast for me

in the presence of my enemies.

You honor me by anointing my head with oil.

My cup overflows with blessings.

Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me

all the days of my life,

and I will live in the house of the Lord


This chapter impacted me made me realized prior to the entrance of the darkest valley of my life, I enjoyed all years of blessings from God was due to God’s grace and compassion.   My deadly battle with alcoholism for 12 years has put me into the darkest valley of my life where I lost everything what has been blessed in my life by God.  It is because of my adultery act with alcoholism.  No wonder King Solomon said in the book of Proverbs:

So now, my sons, listen to me. Never stray from what I am about to say: Stay away from her! Don’t go near the door of her house! If you do, you will lose your honor and will lose to merciless people all you have achieved. Strangers will consume your wealth, and someone else will enjoy the fruit of your labor. In the end you will groan in anguish when disease consumes your body. You will say, “How I hated discipline! If only I had not ignored all the warnings! Oh, why didn’t I listen to my teachers? Why didn’t I pay attention to my instructors? I have come to the brink of utter ruin, and now I must face public disgrace.” ~Proverbs 5:7-14 (NLT)

So after losing everything, I went inside the darkest valley of my life where I began to make an amazing discovery is having a new identity in Christ.   However, being in the darkest valley is not always the joyful, I have to deal with the loss of some people who has been dear to me at the same time I am welcoming new people in my life has become my new true friends.  Even I had dealt with many failures, poor judgement & decisions and even plenty of unrealistic fears. All of those struggles caused me to have some period of living in doubts in God and even a sense of being disconnected from God too.  However the journey inside the darkest valley has helped me to question God about everything.  The biggest advantage of being inside the darkest valley of life, it deepens my intimacy relationship with God, which blossomed God’s unconditional love and amazing kindness in my heart.  My heart was filled with fruit of the spirit from God, which touched the wounding and withering souls out there.

During my journey inside the darkest valley of my life, I am learning to become a true warrior for God by simply letting go of everything and let God mold my heart, which brought me into new destination of my life and also brought me to where I thought I would never go there.  Psalm 23 concludes with blessings after walking inside the darkest valley of the life.

Living in period of trials will lead us to seek God more and more as it helps us become humble before God and realized we are nothing without God.  So, trust me sometime in your life journey in presence you have to let things go and let God handle will bring much blessing in your life.  I never forget one of those close friends of mine coined me as “Deaf Job” it is referred from the Book of Job in Holy Bible.  There are too many assumptions that being inside the darkest valley will bring miserable in your life, it is not that case, but if you rely on God fully then you will be truly amazed what you are seeing in the darkest valley.

Tell you the truth, I was truly lost for the past 19 years of my life journey with God until I finally discovered the true joy of my life as I went inside the darkest valley of my life where it breathed a new identity which is in Christ.  It brought me increase of compassion, love, and kindness toward others.

Let it go Let God is best medicated for your soul!

Are you willing to go inside darkest valley to discover who you are and let God shape your heart?

Do you want to be a true warrior like Ryu Hayabusa?


Ryu walked into no man’s land as everything is dark as he searched for truth and justice, it brought him to face his own greatest enemies who are out to destroy him.  So don’t let anything get you down inside darkest valley.  At the end of darkest valley, everything will be revealed as who is your true people and being always with you all ways!  One biggest lesson I learned in the dark valley is to forgive others for what they don’t know what they are doing.  Forgiveness brings joy and blessing in your life.

Trust me, I was there…

God loves you more than you can image of and you are truly unique in God’s eyes.


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